This is one woman’s hard long struggle battling infertility and how she finally won.
When my husband and I got married, I wanted us to wait for two years preferably before we start trying for a baby. So within the first two years of our marriage, I was not bothered with the whole issue of fertility and pregnancy. But after our two year wait, conception was not happening. Two years turned into three and then these three years turned into five. Medically, infertility is defined as the inability to achieve pregnancy after having unprotected sex for two years. My husband and I have had unprotected sex for more than these two years and conception wasn’t happening at all. What could be wrong? We really began to get worried about our inability to conceive.
Now let me take you to years back. My husband and I met when I got admission to study for my degree. He was the first and the only man I’ve been intimate with. We were sexually active during our dating days and I wasn’t really bothered of pregnancy because I knew I wasn’t menstruating on the regular. At this time, I didn’t even know what I was going through was PCOS. Not long after I completed, I got pregnant and birth a girl. So my first daughter was by sheer luck. We weren’t even trying at the time.
We got married after our first baby. Then after two years of marriage, that was when we started our journey with trying to conceive and were confronted with dealing with PCOS.
One might ask why it took me five years to finally decide to seek medical help. First of, I know how crazy I may sound, but I had this unshakable belief in God. I believed God in His Power was going to bless me with the fruit of the womb. One day at church, my Bishop made a profound statement which has stuck with me till date. That day, my Bishop made a statement about having faith in God and working towards one’s goals in life. In this moment, he shifted my thoughts on not just having faith in God, but then working on my own to seek help. That day, my Bishop gave me hope. My faith in God multiplied and I was ready to seek help. Now was the time to act. Where was I supposed to get started?
The first point of call was to go for a medical check up. I spoke with my Doctor who asked me to visit the hospital. This was the beginning. I had taken this bold step with faith in God and i was determined to see it to the end.
After series of tests, I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. (PCOS). I had read about this condition sometime back but didn’t read it into details. PCOS is a hormonal disorder causing enlarged ovaries with small cysts on the outer edges. Some of the symptoms of PCOS are severe acne, ceased menstruation, memory lapses, hot flashes, hair loss among others. Truthfully, I was experiencing almost all of these symptoms but never bothered to go for a medical check up.
I was on the verge of depression but because I had started to seek help with all the faith and positivity, I had to forge on. My husband stood by me through it all. He prayed with me and took me for my appointments at the hospital.
Now, for conception to take place, a woman must first be able to ovulate. Therefore at this point, my Doctor’s aim was to get me to ovulate. This came with buying expensive drugs and hospital visits. All of these processes, I followed religiously. Then in October, I saw my period after 7-8 months of not menstruating. Yes, my situation was pretty serious. During my period, my Doctor started me on clomid and other medications to boost my chances at ovulation.
Now the journey had began and I was happy with my progress and happy with the way my body was responding positively to medications.
I had committed my every step into God’s hands. Three months into the treatment, I started to feel better about myself and wellbeing. I felt more relaxed and I began to remember things well. My acne also reduced greatly and my periods were back on track. Generally, my wellbeing improved tremendously.
During this journey, I developed the love for reading all in the quest to seeking other opinions. My Doctor expressed delight at my dedication because of how I asked questions about my condition.
In this journey, I became more positive and the relationship between my husband and I grew much stronger. I was not only taking my meds, I made conscious effort to lose extra weight since a person’s weight is also key in conception. I ate healthy and lost 2kg.
Again, I joined an online fertility group. This group was and still is amazing. I got the chance to share my journey with lots of women who were going through similar journeys. We encouraged each other and established some kind of sisterhood.
In my fertile window, my husband and I try our best to stay intimate to increase our chances of conception. Because without sex, all the treatment is going to be both time and money wasting.
One Thursday night after having my shower, I sat close to my husband on the bed. He held my hands, while looking me straight in the eyes. He said “Bee, you see that church theme (pointing to the wall), It’s for you.” This theme on the wall was a 2017 theme that said “I am a testimony”. He assured me of his support and told me to continue having faith in God and that our time of testimony was going to come soon. I got teary and asked ,”What if I don’t have anymore babies, will you be okay?” His reply that gave me real assurance was, “I love you nontheless, but God will give us a testimony soon”.
After three months of treatment and living healthy, God gave us a testimony. One day, I was feeling all weak and dizzy and decided to take a pregnancy test. Lo and behold, for once in my journey yo conceive, I had tested positive to a pregnancy test. My husband and I were overjoyed at this discovery. And till date, I can’t get my husband’s excited expression off my mind. We were happy. Our journey of becoming parents had began.
It took me after three months to conceive when I took the bold step in seeking help. I started this journey in November 2018 and by early February, I was pregnant. I should have taken this step a long time ago but i was quite hesitant.
I’m thankful to God Almighty for giving me reasons to stay strong and firm in this journey. I’m also grateful to my husband. He was my rock. He held my hand and walked this journey with me.
Not forgetting, my Doctor. Dr. Lawerter of Joy Health Center, Banana Inn. He was patient and was always ready to answer my questions and confront my fears.
Later in 2019, we welcomed our healthy bouncy baby girl who is the light of our world.
Dear someone, I hope my story inspires you. Take that bold step. It may be costly, but trust me, it’s all worth it. When you finally hold your bundle of joy in your hands, you’ll forget about the pain of infertility.
Have faith in God but also, back it up with action. It is well.